Suicidal

I realized yesterday as I was sightlessly and unfocused-ly driving to work that I've always been suicidal.

There has always been these many different scenarios in my head as to how I can end it all as quickly as possible.

Through God's love and grace, though, no matter how much I hurt or how hopeless it all seems or how angry at the turn my life has taken I may be, that life is still worth living when you have Christ in it.

So I just let my soul curl up into a tiny little pearl, knowing I am held tightly in God's fisted hand.

He'll never let go...and I don't want Him to.